George Karanja

Invisible Weight

This represents my culture. In Kenya, if you’re carrying something heavy, you put it on your head. You walk with it, then take it off at your destination. I wanted to capture that.

The photo shows the shadow of someone carrying something on their head. It represents responsibility, the weight on your shoulders. It’s okay to carry it, but if it gets too much, you can remove some of it; share the load with someone else. Then it feels lighter. The shadow represents what others can’t see - responsibilities I carry, but others don’t notice. On the outside, I might look fine, but the shadow is carrying the real weight.

As a Deaf Black man, I often feel different. Sometimes I’m the first Deaf person, or the first Black person, or the first Deaf Black person that others have met in different spaces. That creates responsibility, to represent, and that’s a heavy load. It affects my mental health. Sometimes I take that weight off, catch my breath, then carry it again. Sometimes I ask friends for help.

The photo shows that hidden weight. In the photo, you can see the busy world in the background — cars, buses — but you can’t see me, just my shadow. It’s like in the wider world, I’m not visible. But in smaller communities, like the Deaf community or church, I feel seen.

Future and Reflection

That photo was taken a long time ago — in 2019, before the Covid pandemic. I was camping and wanted to show my connection with nature and how I was looking forward to the future; how I saw myself in the future. I’m connecting with my younger self, looking at my younger self and the changes that have occurred. For me it’s all linked; the sun, nature, and how I’ve changed over time, like season by season.

The reason I chose a photo with a reflection in it (the glass reflection) is because I really like reflecting, thinking about my life, the decisions I’ve made, the choices I was struggling with at the time.

This photo shows that reflection is really important for me. It helps with my mental health, because sometimes I feel up and down. The photo represents holding the moment, grounding myself, rewinding — like, "Why am I stressed? Why am I struggling"?

If you look at my face, you see a really hopeful expression. The word ‘trailblazer’ fits — it means excitement, creating your own path. It’s similar to my father — he’s from Kenya, moved to the UK, worked hard, and made his own way. We’re not the same, but in that photo, we’re similar — me, very focused, thinking: "How am I going to create my own path?"

Pause

Recently, I finished university, and a friend came to stay with me. There was this beautiful sunset where I was studying. We were on top of a roof when I took the photo. It’s different from the previous photos. This one represents an ending — I’d achieved my degree, walked through the trees, chopped down the barriers.

It was a calm moment. The city was busy, people working, going about their business, but I felt calm, proud of what I’d achieved. It means if there’s a problem, I focus on the learning, learning a skill, learning from the emotions connected to it, instead of being distracted by the busyness around me.

If you work hard at solving the problem or challenge, you’ll achieve something. It doesn’t matter if things are busy if you just focus on one thing. It’s about achievement, but also about pausing. That pause is so important for mental health. If you’re only focused on getting to the finish line, it can be stressful. But then you pause, and it’s calm.